


A New Cut, Soon To Be A New Scar

by RobronSugdenDingle



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-10
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-21 12:05:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16576142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RobronSugdenDingle/pseuds/RobronSugdenDingle
Summary: Robert knows the warning signs and what to look for. He saw them all and yet...Aaron still lied to him?Or...based after the recent episode 09/11/2018 where Aaron breaks down.





	A New Cut, Soon To Be A New Scar

From the very first day that Robert had slept with Aaron, he had noticed the cuts straight away. Honestly, watching him try to cover his stomach or hide his cuts and scars when they were having sex was quite amusing because it was easy to distract him with a trail of kisses down his stomach before reaching his destination.   
  
And then when he did give Aaron a blow job, his hands would constantly run up the sides of Aaron's waist, pulling his t-shirt up.  
  
Not like the cuts ever actually bothered him, they just added to the guilt of Roberts mind because he knew what sort of person he was dealing with, a sensitive one. Aaron proved that when he had badly hid his jealousy of Chrissie, the mention of Chrissies name.   
  
Before they had become a proper couple, Robert made the habit of counting the scars that littered Aaron's stomach. He wouldn't admit it back then, but he did it because he wondered if Aaron was still cutting. Now, being a proper couple, Robert knew what warning signs to look for before asking Aaron if he had another cut.  
  
The constant need for 'alone time', walks, not eating, mood swings, constant arguing with Robert, lack of sex and not taking his shirt off for bed was a huge one and pretty obvious.   
  
But it had been over a year since he had last done it and the scars hadn't disappeared, but they had faded into nice white and pale pink lines. The deepest one on his arm and stomach had turned dark purple but according to the doctors, these could take years to disappear or fade. So Robert just assumed that Aaron had fallen out the habit, especially with all the counselling sessions he had and discussed everything with Robert.  
  
They were a team now and they told each other everything.  
  
So, it worried him when he returned home from Rebecca's and didn't find Aaron in the livingroom. He checked upstairs and did find him however, in their bedroom, Aaron lying on his side on top of the covers and he sniffled into the pillow. He hadnt seen Robert come in because his back was to him so he couldn't even hide.  
  
Robert put a hand on the back of Aaron's shoulder and watched him flinch badly before wiping his eyes and nose with his sleeve.  
  
"Aaron..."  
  
"I wasn't crying. Just thinking too much"   
  
"Well don't. Tell me, come on"   
  
Aaron nodded and opened his mouth to talk, but shut it and gave a bitter laugh.  
  
"Just thinking about Seb. Sorry..."  
  
Robert frowned and hugged his husband.  
  
"Don't apologise. Just...talk to me ok?"  
  
Aaron squeezed his eyes shut in pain when Roberts stomach pressed against his.  
  
Just before they went to bed, Robert had made them both a cup of tea and slices of toast and he saw it. One large chefs knife sitting in the draining board. He coughed and turned to look at Aaron.  
  
"How come the Cooks knife's out? Were you cooking earlier?"  
  
He noticed Aaron's slight jump on the couch.  
  
"Umm. Oh yeah! I had to chop some vegetables for mum earlier. She's making soup i think she said"  
  
Liar   
  
"She walked all the way over here just so you could chop some vegetables?"  
  
Aaron nodded and Robert turned around with a frown. He thought they were going to talk to each other, that was what they promised.  
  
"Ok then..."  
  
They had their tea and toast and went straight to bed but not before checking up on Liv who was fast asleep in her bed. Robert knew what was wrong with Aaron, he just needed to see it with his own eyes and so far, this was the only plan.  
  
As soon as they lay in bed, Robert went straight to kissing his husband, kissing his neck and pressing into his thighs because this was the quickest way to get Aaron going. At first, he kissed back but as soon as Roberts hands touched Aaron's hip, it was like his hand had burned his skin because he jolted away as fast as he could.  
  
"Hey...hey what's wrong?"  
  
Aaron shook his head and turned on his side.  
  
"Nothing. Just not in the mood tonight..."  
  
"Really? You wanna take your shirt off then, heat the bed up a little?"  
  
Aaron shook his head again and Robert huffed and sat up and flicked the bedside lamp on.  
  
"I knew it. I flippin knew it!"  
  
Aaron sat up and frowned and switched his lamp on.  
  
"Knew what?"  
  
"Don't play dumb with me and don't make me look like an idiot. Aaron, you can tell me...please, but you're cutting again aren't you?"  
  
"No-"  
  
"Take your shirt off then"   
  
Aaron didn't respond to that and Robert sighed and wrapped an arm around Aaron.  
  
"Please. I just wanna see-"  
  
"One. It was one small cut. Honestly. One small cut and I stopped because I knew it was wrong and I'm just getting better an-I'm so sorry!"  
  
Robert pulled Aaron in close and kissed the side of his head.  
  
"Can I see?"  
  
Aaron only had to pull his shirt up from the bottom to reveal a new cut. It was already lumpy with a scab over it and the size of his pinky toe and it sat just above his belly button.   
  
"You could've spoke to me"  
  
Aaron scoffed.  
  
"Yeah, speak to my husband who hates me for being an idiot and losing our child forever just because I wanted to be selfish and keep him for our own"   
  
He expected Robert to start shouting at him if he was honest, expect him to say something just so Aaron could have an argument with him and he could sleep on the couch. Instead, Robert kissed the top of Aaron's head and squeezed him close.  
  
"Tomorrow, we'll go back to counselling"   
  
And Aaron didn't scream or shout. He only nodded and relaxed in the hold of his husband as Robert ran a hand up and down his stomach. This was a new cut, soon to be a new scar and this was a new thing for Robert to keep an eye on. 


End file.
